The British Open

Waking up at 11 am to John Daly leading the British Open is like Christmas Morning. Instead of presents, Santa has stayed behind, lost the beard, donned nylon pants, and is hitting monstrous drives. The other day I watched Rome is Burning and in between bouts of yelling and repetative sentence structure (Ending every sentence with a rhetorical "IS IT?"), Jime rome asked what there is to like about the British Open. I ask, What isnt to like? Long holes, deep bunkers, deeper rough, an the natural beauty of Scotland, paired with low scores usually achieved through masterful play. The hardest open the British is not, but where else can you see Tiger woods shoot 18 under for the week in a major championship. The longest drivers (such as John Daly) get to flex their muscles for four days, and we are treated to a slew of long puts on gigantic rolling greens. This year at Carnoustie also brings in the interesting sub plot of Mr. J. Van de Velde. While TNT pounds his breakdown on the 18th into the fairway, the soundtrack is provided by Queen's "Under Pressure". The shot of Van de Velde staring down his shot into the rough as if someone had taken a tack hammer to his foot (sad, pathetic, angry, inqusitive), framed by Freddy Mercury and David Bowies sweeping vocals was priceless. So this year I am hoping for equally entertaining magic. I want to see John Daly staring down the 10 mile fairway as if prohibition had just come back into effect. I want to see Tiger woods destroy the field in a perfect demonstration of why he is the best golfer in the world. I want to see the stories that only the British open can produce, and if the music of Queen can provide the soundtrack, I will not complain.

Addendum: John Daly has succesfully double bogeyed two of the last three holes, returning to even. Either he is going to win or be sent to rehab by the 12th tomorrow. In his honor I will follow the rest of his round, forsaking all others for what could be a shot at greatness.

Somewhere around 11 am. Location 11th Green:
John: Wow, im leading the British Open. 5 under aint to bad, and really while playing like this I feel like i could give up drinking.

11:08, Location- 12th fairway
John: Nah

11:40, Location- 15th tee
A double and triple bogey, and a pint of Scotch later, Big Bad John sits at even. Not really displaying what the announcers call "a great touch around the green". Hooters and 84 lumber are getting nervous, hoping for either a comeback or a monumental breakdown. Even doesnt sell wings and two by fours.

11:58
Plus 1, through 15. An impressive 6 shot turn around. Daly adresses every shot like he is on the driving range. He looks at the ball, takes a half practice swing, then bombs away. He is on pace to finish the round in exactly one hour.

12:00
TNT has opted not to show John Daly sitting around the fish and chips stand, I am dissapointed. Hope springs eternal as the Big Guy rims out a birdie putt. Now he needs just a handful of eagles to get back to the top.

12:06
Golf has a halftime show? Who knew? Lexus at the turn leaves me with a huge chase group at three under. Already an 18 yr old is sitting in the pack, as well as a Achie (sp?) Sato, who apparently only plays in a handful of tournements a year.